ChapStick

Could we live without it? Some would say: “yes”, but I would say: “Well your just plain stupid”. Living without ChapStick is like living in a world without turbos. Sure our existence would go on, but what would we live for, and how else would we get V6 performance from a 4-cyclinder? ChapStick is one of life’s little commodities that we love to take for granted, it’s only when we need it that we appreciate it. The same goes with breathing, it never fails that as soon as your 90ft under water with no air you think “Cripes! I would watch 5 movies where Mary-Kate and Ashley switch places just to have one breath of air!” This is why I have come to appreciate ChapStick all year round, not just in the week of winter. For some reason I seem to have chronic dry lips, which is why I always have Chapstick available to me.

Having badly chapped lips is a lot like having chapped legs when you have to run a mile, (which is a pretty bad day (although I don’t really know, I’m just guessing)) it makes you just want to curl into a ball and cry. When you find a store, picking the flavor is like having to pick between ice cream and pecan pie. They always have great ones like “Banana-Raspberry Fruit Cocktail” and “Carmel-Flan Fun”. Just remember not using ChapStick is like driving a Porsche 911 with 103 octane on radials thinking that you’ll have traction to the rear wheels.